March 01, 2010


I've been thinking all day long, and found that I was lost. Maybe, sometimes, i regret it, why must i spent my young age in this suck place, did unfairness to other people, and myself. I dunno, it's annoying, but I was to scared to get out. There's so many "what if" in my mind, so I couldn't make any decisions. I wish I could be braver. Flying away from this job, and discover what exactly I wanna do.

Could you find differences between runaway for giving up and runaway for searching something better? If i leave now, do i look surrender? Do I look weak and powerless? Well, i wish i own any ideas to show my power limit, but actually i don't. I can differ if I can't resist it anymore, or it just my spoiled behavior?

I was tired, and I've been saying it loud on and on. But, why i didn't go away? Why do i stay? I don't love this, I even don't know any reason to stay. Did I afraid of matters? Money? Maybe it's true, but happiness can be bought by money, right? It's true, indeed, even most of them saying the opposite.

Trying to be happy by sharing happiness to other. I hope I can make you glad, but sometimes I couldn't hide my gloomy feelings. So sorry for this imperfection. But, readers, we're still human being, who needs to complain sometimes, right? I don't find justification, but you all must be agree, sometimes I need to spam.

It's only another ordinary day in life, nothing different, but I need one. I need a difference. It's too flat, I feel dead. Is anyone who can help me through these?



  1. You should plan what is your target,example your resolution in 2010. Make your plan-to-do to achieve those targets;daily, weekly, and monthly. So you can fill your time with passion, you can make your day busy, so you don't ever feel powerless anymore. Go fight! :)

    Btw, hello, I am newbie at blogging. You can visit my blog

  2. well, i'm dealing with a similar situation out here.
    i believe we can run, if we really want to. we can pause for a while, we can play around with new stuff. the point is, do what we really want to.

    take care, sister :)

  3. take a chance. take risk. it's better to regret something we did than regret something we never do :)

  4. It's best to know yourself better before choosing what you like. When you're ready, you'll be able to get what you wanna do, so good luck! Don't be depressed by anything, let keep your fighting spirit!

  5. @ wulan. hey, thank you. i'll try my best for it! :)

    @ Ra-kun. yes, now i have all my efforts to run. follow your nice idea!

    @devishanty. everything always come with a risk, and i hate risks. but, it's life, we must face it, right?

    @nathary yeah, hard to know ourselves, sometimes we feel we have known ourselves better.