geez, no idea for writing something. i feel my mind is stumped. what's up dela???
usually, i always have some ideas to be poured down,
now..
blank.
i got a comment from someone, dunno who is she/he.. (can u tell me?)
but thanks a lot, progressivaholic, i really didnt expect to be someone's inspiration,hehe
i thought today will be great, i really love friday,
batik-day, and i have an hour-free for myself in room, when all the men in this office going to Jumat pray. and what's better than weekend tomorrow???
hah..
but, everything' getting disorder, when i heard a news just now. sorry, can't tell u what it tells, my privacy, but it reverse my world here!
i think world will never be prettier as before,he..
i was surprised, my moving to Medan didnt need a tough adaptation. i like being here, i love people around me.. (yeah, yeah..) and i haven't felt any loneliness yet. (dunno what's going on tomorrow). i feel so much fun and hope it'll last until i come back to jakarta.
one of my trifling problem is no girlfriend here, but it isn't important at all. i can handle it.
i cant wait til having around in this city, culinary travel, taste durian (you wont believe, here, durians are so cheap!!!! you can get 3 by paying only 25 thousands rupiah!), and of course shopping! i haven't shop for this month, i still wonder who i will ask for accompanying me,
i miss head office, a bit.
i miss the smell of dvrt's room.
i miss hiding from mrs.santi when i chatted.. (he, sorry mrs..)
i miss time when mr. partha calls me, and gives me some presenting job, and tells me the he doesn't like bright colors, nor dark colors.
i miss beti..huhu..
i miss gang senggol, we have no canteen here, we have no "food court" like gang senggol here..
yayayay! many things that i've already missed.
cant wait til we meet again.
November 28, 2008
November 26, 2008
a bit of narcism..way from CIBUBUR!!!!
Medan
finally..here i am..
Medan, unknown city, place that i've never visited before..
too bad, i was the one who be sent here by my office, just two days after opb in cibubur..
packing made me tired, also sad.
how come? i've just stayed in jakarta for a month, and after hard adaptation, i was forced to left, and move into new situation. peevish.
my heart was beating fast when my plane landed in polonia.. everything was so strange and unusual..
haha..fortunately, i have two friends for accompanying me, so i wont get bored at all..
and guess???
i am one and only GIRL in office!!! i mean it..
geez, miss beti so much ( she has been sent to surabaya ), i've no idea how i'll through it all. wish me luck.
no time for going around. i hope i'll have some break times for hanging out. i cant wait til i can see how pretty medan is, so i wont complaint, and keep my sadness.
hope, it can end soon.
ok, lunch time is coming, and i have to go..
sorry, i just can update it shortly, i promise, next time will be better..
bye.
November 17, 2008
Live from Cibubur
Hah,it's just unbelieveable. I've been here,for a week..many things happened.life become tough and beautiful at same time. Yeah,like roller coaster.
So painful. I mean it. Be unfocus, and keep on pretending is my daily act. After last nightmare on Friday, i keep crying, crying, and crying. Wanna runaway, and must have done it, as if i didnt remember my mum. I even thought of death. Trust me, it's so painful, my heart keep beating unrhytmely, and i was lost on my own way.
During this week, i've been following an orientation for new employees. We have been being trained by some armies military. Yup, i wasnt kidding. MILITARY. i enjoyed it,as long as i didnt remember my fam's problem. I was so tired,being happy-calm-gladful girl in front of all my friends. But,it didnt matter. All i've done is for my mum.. (Read this carefully mum,even i tried be brave enough to hug those cobras, just for you!)
I am missing my guys already. Basecamp guys. This situation remind me of them, and i cant get them out of my head. I love them.
Lan texts me,she just wanna know when i will go home. I laughed at heart,got a big confusing at where i will go home. Where's my home now? I have no idea,but gosh, i am starting to miss her too..
Struggling hard here every day.SO HARD. Against our tiring,facing some new rules (u wont believe, i'll publish some pics later,when i am home),and keep surviving from a new fling. It is SO DANGEROUS,and i dont want being trapped anymore. NEVER.
Almost being mad,but start to enjoy it.keep positive thinking,there are people who still love me sincerely.
Even,after every hard storm,
Rainbow appears...
So painful. I mean it. Be unfocus, and keep on pretending is my daily act. After last nightmare on Friday, i keep crying, crying, and crying. Wanna runaway, and must have done it, as if i didnt remember my mum. I even thought of death. Trust me, it's so painful, my heart keep beating unrhytmely, and i was lost on my own way.
During this week, i've been following an orientation for new employees. We have been being trained by some armies military. Yup, i wasnt kidding. MILITARY. i enjoyed it,as long as i didnt remember my fam's problem. I was so tired,being happy-calm-gladful girl in front of all my friends. But,it didnt matter. All i've done is for my mum.. (Read this carefully mum,even i tried be brave enough to hug those cobras, just for you!)
I am missing my guys already. Basecamp guys. This situation remind me of them, and i cant get them out of my head. I love them.
Lan texts me,she just wanna know when i will go home. I laughed at heart,got a big confusing at where i will go home. Where's my home now? I have no idea,but gosh, i am starting to miss her too..
Struggling hard here every day.SO HARD. Against our tiring,facing some new rules (u wont believe, i'll publish some pics later,when i am home),and keep surviving from a new fling. It is SO DANGEROUS,and i dont want being trapped anymore. NEVER.
Almost being mad,but start to enjoy it.keep positive thinking,there are people who still love me sincerely.
Even,after every hard storm,
Rainbow appears...
November 11, 2008
more pics of me. hope it didnt make you bored
Oh yeah..i’ve promised you too, for publishing my office, but sorry I hadn’t taken lotsa pics, cuz I’am still new person here, I must impress them, and showing as if I am working hard, instead of taking pics there, there, and there..hehe..
So..here..
It’s me..in batik, which means Friday. And have I mentioned that I really love Friday? when everything are out of box, and I must not wear my WHITE SHIRT,haha..
Yes, I was sitting in front of my desk. Behind me, there is Mrs. Santi’s desk, who is my boss, so I must be careful, always, to prevent she, catching me up when I was using internet connection for silly things (yeah,like friendstering)
My desk!!!
Haha..finally you see it. I know, every tiny things go mess around, haha, but that wasn’t my fault. 75 % of those things isn’t my belongings, so I don’t want waste my time to make it tidy. Haha, selfish. After all, I’ll leave it, cuz few weeks later I’ll go to Medan.
Wait..wait.. I haven’t told you yet.
I’ve been removed to Medan. The letter came about two days ago, informed that I would be allocated in Medan after new employee’s orientation in Cibubur this week. Shocked? Yeah, a bit. I’ve prepared it, cuz there’s an issue before, telling it too. Ready? No, I think I will never be ready for my whole life. Being far from my family is usual for me. But, from my sweetest thing. I couldn’t take any guarantee. I am not brave. I am scared. So much. But it’s life. Can’t go with our own way. Haaah.. I am so lazy to discuss this Medan-things. Let’s catch this up later.
So..here..
It’s me..in batik, which means Friday. And have I mentioned that I really love Friday? when everything are out of box, and I must not wear my WHITE SHIRT,haha..
Yes, I was sitting in front of my desk. Behind me, there is Mrs. Santi’s desk, who is my boss, so I must be careful, always, to prevent she, catching me up when I was using internet connection for silly things (yeah,like friendstering)
My desk!!!
Haha..finally you see it. I know, every tiny things go mess around, haha, but that wasn’t my fault. 75 % of those things isn’t my belongings, so I don’t want waste my time to make it tidy. Haha, selfish. After all, I’ll leave it, cuz few weeks later I’ll go to Medan.
Wait..wait.. I haven’t told you yet.
I’ve been removed to Medan. The letter came about two days ago, informed that I would be allocated in Medan after new employee’s orientation in Cibubur this week. Shocked? Yeah, a bit. I’ve prepared it, cuz there’s an issue before, telling it too. Ready? No, I think I will never be ready for my whole life. Being far from my family is usual for me. But, from my sweetest thing. I couldn’t take any guarantee. I am not brave. I am scared. So much. But it’s life. Can’t go with our own way. Haaah.. I am so lazy to discuss this Medan-things. Let’s catch this up later.
lotsa pics from my graduation day
Hahaha.. blogreaders, I’ve tried being honest with you. I’ve been preparing this writing since a night before, instead of arranging it directly, live (cast in place, according to civil phrase,huhu..funny..) like I usually do. the reason is a day before it (which means today, when I prepare this posting) my boss has complaint me about how long I’ve used my time for browsing, blogging, and friendstering instead of working. (whether I guess it didn’t true, I’ve done my job, and she didn’t ask me to do anything, why couldn’t I do something more important? hehe). Yeah, whatever it is, I think it’ll be better if I make this at home, so tomorrow, I’ll can post it by copying and pasting, so it won’t take long time. And she won’t complaint me again,hoho..
It’s strange to say that I am lack of idea. Serious. I dunno what to write. I feel like a dumb. I don’t blame myself, even most creative authors have through their hard times, aren’t they? And me, I just ordinary girls, with personal blog, trying to impress everyone else with my unimportant bla..bla..and cas..cis..cus..and kwek..kwek..kwek.. (kidding, I really NEVER mean to impress anyone. NEVER) so, why can’t I feel an emptiness, and blankness?
So I’ll fulfill my promise to publish some pics. I’ve told you I’ll attach some pics here, which should be set in few times ago, but pardon me, cuz of my laziness to bring a data cable, so I can’t remove all my photos.
Remember? I’ve graduate just about a week ago. Here’s some pics from my graduation day.
Me and my dearest friends. I’ve just separated with them for few days, but it feels like thousands ages! I couldn’t imagine that I’ll find another like them. How precious you are in my life!
From left to right : Tosan, Wuri, me, Vega, Adit. We’ve struggle hard and finally! This is the day, friends! Our time’s arrived. But life is just begun,,
Dunno, why I sets this pic. Wime took it, and seems it great and funny. Narcist. Haha..
Speechless. I am just missing him.
Still speechless.
Gold heels : me
Black-dirty-ugly sneakers : my brother.
Yup, my brother, he used sneaker on my graduation day. I know he’s so casual, but please, can’t he respect one day –just one day in my life--- to look formal?? But I don’t think he’ll try hard. That was the proof.
Yup..some pics from my personal life.
I hope it won’t bore you all, cuz I really like share my narcism to everyone..haha,,
It’s strange to say that I am lack of idea. Serious. I dunno what to write. I feel like a dumb. I don’t blame myself, even most creative authors have through their hard times, aren’t they? And me, I just ordinary girls, with personal blog, trying to impress everyone else with my unimportant bla..bla..and cas..cis..cus..and kwek..kwek..kwek.. (kidding, I really NEVER mean to impress anyone. NEVER) so, why can’t I feel an emptiness, and blankness?
So I’ll fulfill my promise to publish some pics. I’ve told you I’ll attach some pics here, which should be set in few times ago, but pardon me, cuz of my laziness to bring a data cable, so I can’t remove all my photos.
Remember? I’ve graduate just about a week ago. Here’s some pics from my graduation day.
Me and my dearest friends. I’ve just separated with them for few days, but it feels like thousands ages! I couldn’t imagine that I’ll find another like them. How precious you are in my life!
From left to right : Tosan, Wuri, me, Vega, Adit. We’ve struggle hard and finally! This is the day, friends! Our time’s arrived. But life is just begun,,
Dunno, why I sets this pic. Wime took it, and seems it great and funny. Narcist. Haha..
Speechless. I am just missing him.
Still speechless.
Gold heels : me
Black-dirty-ugly sneakers : my brother.
Yup, my brother, he used sneaker on my graduation day. I know he’s so casual, but please, can’t he respect one day –just one day in my life--- to look formal?? But I don’t think he’ll try hard. That was the proof.
Yup..some pics from my personal life.
I hope it won’t bore you all, cuz I really like share my narcism to everyone..haha,,
November 07, 2008
farewell, long distance
farewell is not fun at all.
yesterday was my graduation day, and i feel lotsa feeling..
relieved and affected, finally it comes, time when i walked to the front, received congrats from my rector.
and guess??
being 1st female graduate at commencement makes me feel a great pride. i was the 1st person walking up the stair. i was the person, who sat on 1st numbered chair. i could brought my parents walk toward with lotsa joys and prides.
but, after party's over, i must faced reality. i must back into real world. so hard, cuz graduation days for me means breaking all the bond. Bond between me in my campus, bond between me and my lecturers, bond between me and my friends. i didnt say that i wont face them again, but everything will change. we've grew up, living in our own way, step alone. no more hanging out cz we're on different track.
i still keeping it and dont want to waste it away. i keep thinking times will never change, and keep thinking that things always be the same.
haha.. must throw that child-feeling away.
long distance isn't fun at all.
honestly, i hate walking on this. i am sick of this "long distance" thing. i am revolted of the "it's for our both future" idea. i just wanna be with him. sounds selfish,i know, but f***ked with all theory, my heart, my feeling never lies.
i can't enjoy it. i dunno, whether it's my fate or no, whether i've tried enough or no, i just think i cant. i feel like hypocrite, sometimes i told my friends to change their mindset, so the can receive everything in life sincerely. but, now i feel empty, and i just can implement it.
yeah..i am not grateful enough. with all God's bless, i still moaning. i am a jerk.
but, nothing i can do. nothing,
geez, i miss him so much,
update.
i've read one posting, which could make me cry..read this. maybe i am too dramatic and melancholic. i dunno.
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